1. For the man who gets lost a lot
These compass cufflinks can help you orienteer your way home when you get lost in the wilderness while wearing formal attire.
2. For the pyromaniac/smoker
Stressful meeting? Need a cigarette? Or perhaps to burn the office down to cover up for those discouraging numbers you sent to your boss? These can help.
3. For the timekeeper
Whether you’re cooking eggs, keeping track of your meeting length, or you just like watching sand fall, these are the cufflinks for you.
4. For the dangerous
Perhaps you’ve forgotten your lunch and money. With these cufflinks, you’ll be able to field-dress a deer, or mug someone for their lunch.
5. For the stylish geek
Pretend you’re a secret agent and steal crucial documents by plugging your USB cufflinks into the mainframe. Or, more likely, take home those files you have to spend all night working on.
6. For the person who has a QR code reader on their phone
Create a QR code and then put it on your cufflinks. Everyone will want to know what it does. You’ll have loads of people taking pictures of your wrists.
7. For the person who doesn’t like cufflinks but still wants cufflinks or buys shirts that require cufflinks by mistake
No one will know. And you’ll be able to bask in the knowledge that you’ve fooled all of your colleagues with these clever button-looking cufflinks. Mwa. Ha. Ha.
8. For the man who rules the world
If you own the world, you can now wear it on your sleeve with these globe cufflinks. Or sit in boring meetings and amuse yourself by spinning them and imaging that you’re making the actual world spin by doing so. You evil tyrant, you.
9. For the man who doesn’t know what day it is
Never miss a meeting again with these calendar cufflinks.
10. For the would-be carpenter
These spirit level cufflinks may inspire you to take up carpentry. On the other hand, you may just end up checking that the top of your PC monitor is level, or that all of your HB pencils are straight when you get a bit bored.
11. For the office referee
If you need to break up office arguments, you can use these working whistle cufflinks to mediate. Or shout ‘Stop! Thief!’ when you know someone is stealing office supplies.
12. For the numbers man
Always being asked for numbers? Rather than use a calculator or an Excel formula, why not use these abacus cufflinks and take it old school. Werd.
13. For the clock-watcher
Desperate to get out of the office? Always watching the clock? With these clock cufflinks, you can now stare at these and your boss won’t know you’re counting the minutes.
14. For the secret agent/romantic
Whether it’s a top secret code for taking over the world, or a romantic message to remind you that someone outside the office loves you, these cufflinks will do the job and have you whistling the Mission impossible tune all day.
15. For the entertainer
Lighten your colleagues’ day by bringing your guitar into work, unclipping one of your pick cufflinks and strumming away. Nothing like a rousing chorus of ‘kumbuya’ to lift the spirit in the office.
16. For the sickly man
Inform paramedics of your allergy to to penicillin with these handy medic-alert cufflinks. Provided they check your cuffs (and why wouldn’t they?) you’ll be alright.
17. For the poisoner/smuggler
Pour some poison in your bosses coffee to help you climb the greasy pole, or smuggle tiny little things out of the office with these secret compartment cufflinks.